As busy as things have been lately, I sort of feel like we’re hitting our stride in parenthood. We certainly don’t have it all figured out but we’re in a pretty good rhythm and schedule, and that is something that always works well for us. Now, I know that’s all about to change as we get into summer, but I feel good about what we have planned for the boys in the coming months and really just how Clint and I have collaborated together to make a plan that we hope will lead to a busy and fun summer for all of us.
Being a mom is absolutely my greatest joy and my biggest challenge. It’s always changing, making me smile, making me cry and making me laugh A LOT. In celebration of Mother’s Day coming up, I’m sharing some things I’ve been doing to be a better mom and really to just enjoy the journey of parenthood more.
Let It Go
As one of my favorite Peloton instructors says (and yes I can relate just about everything in life to Peloton), “if it doesn’t serve you well then let that sh*t go, Elsa!” This is something I have not always been good at but I’ve found it much easier to do in recent months. I really try to let negative things roll off of my shoulders and just focus on what I can do to change or improve a situation if I need to.
I began to realize that if negative things happened at work, with friends or otherwise, it was sneaking into the attitude I had around the boys and I didn’t like that feeling. I would start to get snippy with them over insignificant things and just one day made a conscious decision to try and let things go. Like I said, it’s not something that comes easy, so if I realize I’m holding on to something, I stop and make an effort to say “let’s move on.”
The Power of Calm
This is more of a lesson that I’ve learned about my kids. I think back to when they were newborns and we had no idea what to do and someone told me “you’re just getting to know each other, it will take awhile to figure it out.” That rang true then and it actually does now too, we’re learning new things about each other all the time.
When things happen (you know, like your kid punches another kid in the face at school. Yup, it happened not that long ago.), we have learned that getting angry and raising voices results in the exact opposite reaction that we want, especially with Jackson. Calm, however, often results in really productive conversations where we all end up happier with the resolution. Again, not always easy to do, but we’ve learned that we’re all still getting to know the boys as they get older and their personalities develop more, and as they face new things in their days.
Striving for Balance
I’ve gone through times where I’ve sort of felt like my work/life balance has pretty much sucked. Because I work for myself, there are weeks where I feel like I work all. the. time. and I do. The fact that I get to do work I love for clients I love is so amazing and I feel really lucky that my business has grown the way it has. I think because I do like it so much, that I want to work more and I want to do a good job and put in the time I need to in order to make that happen.
For me the one thing I’m focusing on now is shutting down at a certain point in the day and saying “work is over, time to be home and be present.” It was easy to leave an office and go home, but when your office IS home, that line is blurred and it’s a bit tougher to shut down. My goal, however, is to start putting my phone upstairs from the time the boys get home from school until they go to bed. Sort of force myself to disconnect for that time and be a part of whatever it is we’re doing together as a family.
I’m not sure there ever really is a balance for all things work and family, but I think there’s a way to get close to it. It’s a constantly changing thing that I know I’ll always be working on but I like to think I’m getting better at it as time goes on!
Enjoying Every Minute
I was organizing Jackson’s school folder the other day and his last calendar of the year was in there. And on the last day of school it says “Welcome to First Grade.” Whoa, first grade. That hit me and I actually got a little teared up for a second (not like me AT ALL!). When did that happen? Didn’t we just bring him home from the hospital?
We’re so busy and time is moving so fast that I’m trying to take advantage of the quiet moments and enjoy them. I used to check my Apple Watch while I was rocking Dylan on my shoulder and singing with him before he went to sleep. Now I’m making sure that I don’t do that at all. I just sit there and snuggle with him and enjoy our few minutes we have together before he goes to bed. I can check my watch later. I do want to get better about this with my phone too.
I’m excited for a summer of lots of time together and to being present and enjoying this time with all of us.
I can’t end this post without quickly talking about this outfit! This Vive La Mere tee is from BURU and it is not only a really cute tee (it comes in white, black and pink), but it also supports Bring Change To Mind, which is an organization that works to end the stigma of mental illness. I’m thrilled to support BURU in sharing this cause and $15 of each tee sold goes to support it, so please consider this tee as a great gift to a mom in your life or for yourself!
Shop the Post
BURU Vive La Mere Tee (also comes in pink and white) // Kendra Scott Earrings c/o // BURU Bella Ball Skirt // Saint Laurent Tribute Heels (similar style under $100 here) // Target Rainbow Clutch (old, similar here and here) // Lip Color: Urban Decay Vice in Backtalk
Photos thanks to Eleven Creative